pleasure
I am pondering pleasure, the policing of pleasure, and pelvic anatomy.
a poem:
Tide pools
ripe and fertile
Currents swirling
Places of depth
The octopus tissues
Rise and fall
Cannot be tricked but
Can be coaxed
Did you know a clitoris is like
an octopus, a spider, the head of Medusa?
Its purpose is pleasure
The pleasure that seeds worlds
We are still mired in our long history of policing pleasure.
All kinds of pleasure, intimate, sensual, friendly, simple (especially simple, it is hard to sell a simple pleasure although no less than 1000 advertising campaigns are out there right now trying.)
Where has the policing of pleasure gotten us? Our relationship as a species to pleasure is one of our most distorted.
The energetic pleasure current is a powerful force, and it is impossible to truly stop an energetic current. But when we enact will, force, coercion upon it, it adapts by moving underground, warping, and attaching itself to other things. Such as, things we may hide, which overall can be ok for survival when we are children, but hiding often infests the pleasure with shame, and then our pleasure current gets all mingled up with the shame. Or substances that may be socially encouraged, while they also are a distraction and addictive. Mind numbing screens. Toxic drama. Adrenaline. Even negative self-talk may fall under the category of distorted pleasure current.
When the pleasure current is smoothly running and allowed to connect without twisting, it is moving us towards our path, sacred longings, next lessons- towards more life. When our pleasure current is warped it moves us in ways that diminish our life force.
It is worth naming boredom here, that elusive quality once so easy to find, now with hardly any time for it to bloom. The faster we attach our pleasure current to manufactured pleasure the less room it has to seek and find what it is really after.
It took me a long time to realize that the pleasure I was attaching to getting a buzz from alcohol was actually my inner longing to be a little wild, to let go. And the quickest most socially acceptable, easily packaged way was to drink. Everyone did it, it was easy. But for me, it was ultimately taking more than it gave. How freeing to realize it wasn't the alcohol buzz I was seeking at all but the space to laugh loudly, be unplanned, move my body large, and feel the elements pressing against me.
The forces that work specifically against sexual and sensual pleasure and police the body are some of the most compressive, violent, and controlling forces out there. There is such an incredibly long history of persecuting magic, witches, herbalists, empowered humans, the natural world, sex workers, orgasms, healers, the doulas of birth and death, artists, and anyone else outside of the forceful hammer of prescribed “righteousness” (Prescribed by whom?!). This is an attempt to control and deny pleasure, because real pleasure is the guiding force of our life, expansion, and evolution. People able to access pleasure on their own are far less easy to control. There is lot more to be said about this, but I will leave it there for now.
Let’s come back to right now, this moment:
I ask you this:
What sparks your pleasure?
Where do you find joy?
Remember to allow for boredom, and at the same time when you find something offer it curiosity and discipline. Become a disciple to your pleasure.
Follow the pleasure current like a human in the desert following a tiny creek of water… drink it in, and immerse yourself as you follow it back to its source.
Test it constantly, is it giving life? If not, what are you really after?
Listen to senses and sensations, they may whisper quietly at first so listen closely.
What does the body want to feel and do, the eyes to see, the ears to hear?
Notice things like:
The conversation between you and a ripe strawberry on a warm afternoon. That breeze through your hair, that silly joke your friend just told. A massage, a community, a dinner, the right kind of touch, whisper, or kiss, sitting with yourself with a kind voice. Sensation. Divine communication. Dance. Music. Poetry. Art.
Be honest! Try again tomorrow.
FOR A PRACTICE GO HERE: